Exam errors

I guess if any of us could see our exam papers and look at the ridiculous errors we’ve made under the pressure of sitting there, trying to rack our brains for what the question means, let alone what the answers are, we might find some pretty hilarious attempts to get something down before the dreaded words ‘Put your pens down, now.’ With the really important exams, public examinations, the answer papers are collected in and disappear… forever from the sight of the candidates.

There was an article recently where examiners contributed their favourite exam errors; I guess some of them are shockingly ignorant, but some just tell of hysterical desperation, to get something down before the tie is up!

The first cells were probably…? Lonely.
Suggest one reason why it is a good idea to collect data by asking the public to observe when conkers open: So the government doesn’t have to do it.
What do the following chemical equations stand for – HCOONa: Matata.
Write an example of a risk: This.
When should a motorist use his or her bright beams? When he wants to be an asshole
Why are there rings on Saturn? Because God liked it, so he put a ring on it
Give a brief explanation of the meaning of the term ‘hard water’: Ice
What is the process for separating a mixture of chalk and sand? A process called flirtation
What is methane? Methane is a smelly greenhouse gas which is produced when trees and/or cows are burned.
What is the meaning of the term ‘activation energy’? It’s what is needed to get me up in the morning.
The Bible is full of interesting caricatures. Explain: In the first book of the Bible, Guinessis, Adam and Eve were created from an apple tree. One of their children,Cain,asked, ‘Am I my brother’s son?’
Where was the American Declaration of Independence signed? At the bottom.
To change centimetres to metres, you…? Take out centi.
What is a vibration? There are good vibrations and bad vibrations. Good vibrations were discovered in the 1960s.
Name one of the early Romans’ greatest achievements: Learning to speak Latin.
What is meant by the term ‘hermaphrodite’? Lady GaGa.