Lost…. and found

Sometimes you lose something which may not be very precious in terms of money, but it irreplaceable in other ways. I was given something once by someone who was very, very dear to me, and it was given to me as she was dying. It was something she had loved and been fond of, and I was touched beyond measure that she passed it to me in her last days.

It was sometime after her death, maybe a year, maybe less, maybe more, when I realised it was not where I knew I had put it. It was small, and not easily seen and could easily have fallen, been knocked, brushed aside by something else. One moment there it was, and the next, there it wasn’t. I searched everywhere, in the vicinity of where I had put it, around and about, in the room, out of the room, in the house, in the car… I emptied the bins and waste-baskets and the Hoover bag, and searched everywhere I could think of. it wasn’t likely but I went through pockets, and purses and bags…

It was lost, I knew it… but even so every time I tidied, or swept or cleaned, I had half an eye out for it… but even so, I knew it was gone. It didn’t dim my memories of her, I remembered her as clearly and as fondly, loved her as dearly, but I felt almost as if I had let her down a little by being so careless. She wouldn’t have thought so, she would have understood, and been philosophical about it, but I was annoyed with myself.

Last week, now living in a different house, with another house move in between here and our original home, there it was on a table in the sitting room. At fist I didn’t recognize it after nearly twenty years, then I couldn’t believe it, then I realised, that yes, it was found! My husband is an artist as well as drummer and he’d had a bag of his paintings in our old house and somehow it had fallen into the bag, been packed away and survived two moves, and survived among some very old paintings which might well have been thrown away when we were trying to clean, clear and tidy, but there it was, the dying gift, of a dear, dear, lovely person.

I have not mentioned any details because it is the idea of lost and found I want to share.