Me and my sister

It’s so strange when you catch sight of someone else in your own face. When my sister and I were growing up you’d probably say that we weren’t the least bit similar. Although we were very close, friends as well as sisters we weren’t alike in personality or appearance. I was older but in many ways, once we had grown out of being little girls, my sister took the role of the eldest. I was forgetful, absent-minded, got excited about odd things which diverted me from what I was supposed to be doing or where we were supposed to be going; my sister was given the tickets, the passports, the money, she kept an eye on the time and the direction we were supposed to be going in. Although I do have a practical side and I’m quick thinking and look for solutions, she was practical in a different way, a more everyday way. Me and my sister

To look at us you would see our family history; I was an Elsden, I was a Walford – she was an Allen and a Matthews – so we each had something from our mum and our dad’s side. I was dark, she was fairer, I had brown eyes she had grey-green, I tanned as quickly as anything, she had fairer skin. I was chunky and broad-shouldered, she was slimmer and slighter. She was stubborn, I was eager to please, she was determined, I was easily diverted and had a tendency to give up – on some things. I was interested in reading and studying, interested in pursuing my education, she was more interested in practical things – although she did way better than me in exams despite how hard I studied and worked for them.

With my two children I see aspects of myself and my husband in both of them, but I also see aspects of my parents. I also see them as me and my sister – one is dark and one is fair, but both have green-grey eyes. One is interested in academic pursuits, one is practical – although both did well academically. There are aspects of their character which reflects me and my sister. They do of course have physical and character traits of their father – but as an only child, he didn’t have a sibling to be different from or similar to!

Last week when I was visiting my sister in her care home, I had to do one of those tests where you stick a wand down your throat and up your nose – the first time I’d had to do it. I looked in the mirror, and suddenly I saw my sister looking at me. I had never seen such a likeness between us before, but suddenly it was as if she was me! It was quite a shock, and when I went in to visit her – at a distance of course, and masked and gowned and gloved, we did have a chuckle at the idea of the Elsden twins. I suddenly remembered, when we were younger – particularly when we were in the swimming club, we were known as the Elsden girls. I wonder if we always looked more like each other than I realised?


    1. Lois

      She was in a car accident when she was eighteen – she was just a passenger and another car went into the side of them and they hit a tree. She was in a coma for several years but thankfully emerged from it, but she has never been able to live at home or independently unfortunately. The care home she is in is wonderful though.


  1. David Lewis

    I was the one that had to decide to take my brother off life support and he died shortly after. It bothered me so much that I had a severe panic attack and ended up in hospital. A lovely nurse taught me prayer and meditation and brought me out of my funk. I swear by some miracle that we were meant to meet as she saved my life.


    1. Lois

      I feel so much for you, what a terrible decision, I am sure you made the right choice. What a terrible affect it had on you, but thank goodness “your” nurse was there, a miracle indeed xxx


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