I’ve mentioned before that I jot odd thoughts down, little scenarios I imagine from observing someone, ideas for stories which come into my head from something observed – or weird but vivid dreams. Sometimes these jottings are obviously the beginning of a story, maybe there are character/s or a conversation which suggest what might happen, a scene is set for action of some sort – but sometimes I have absolutely no idea why I’ve written whatever it is.
I have come across a sheet torn from a notebook with what definitely seems to be the start of a story, although written in a very unusual style for me, although the rhythm is in a pattern I sometimes use. Here it is, if it makes any sense:
There is something at work in my soul which I do not understand. It used to trouble me but now I just slap it down and pour another glass of wine. But maybe it’s something I should confront.
There’s a phrase about killing the thing we love – to be honest, I’ve not actually killed anything yet, although Stanley is still in intensive care. I actually – well, definitely, do not love Stanley – I did love his paintings though. There was something which spoke to me, some shadow, some darkness in his work which communicated with me quite powerfully.
So, the unnamed narrator is probably a woman, who may have caused Stanley whoever he is to be in intensive care. Maybe she was driving and he was a passenger and there was a crash, and she seems to be reflecting unemotionally on what happened, probably having just poured herself a glass of wine. She seems cold and unemotional, and all we know about Stanley is that he’s an artist who paints dark paintings.
To be honest, it’s not really inspiring me, but maybe I need to challenge myself and not just rely on inspiration. My writing has been somewhat sluggish recently, so maybe I need to speak severely to myself and accept the challenge. I think this needs to be the start, and there needs to be a backstory about what led to this scene – which maybe revealed in a chunk of “Let me tell you what happened” or maybe revealed as the story continues. What is the darkness in her soul? Is she dangerous or indifferent? And the paintings… definitely the paintings have something to do with “it” or are significant in some way.
I guess my narrators or main characters aren’t usually the people with dark souls – it’s usually the “baddies” they come across. It would be a real challenge indeed to have a lead character with something sinister and dangerous about them!
Lois Elsden 