I apologise for posting rather a lot of moaning blogs last year – for some reason my writing muse deserted me and I felt as if I had completely run out of steam. It was very strange and slightly disturbing to be in a vacuum where every word was squeezed reluctantly out, like the last of the toothpaste from a virtually empty tube. It wasn’t just my blog which I struggled over, my on-going novel, topics for my writing groups, everything seemed to have become turgid. OK, there were things which happened which didn’t help, but I can’t blame any of them… my writing brain just seemed to have run out of steam. I began to wonder if I would ever get back to where I had been in recent years, and most of my life – even my working and child-raising life!
On New Year’s Eve I wrote a very sombre post, explaining my worries, concerns and sadness over recent events – personal and national and global, and my anxiety for the country we seem to have become and the world we are now living in – and the future of both. As i wrote it I began to feel that negativity and gloom would help nothing – and I listed all the things I am so grateful for and which are huge positives. Even when I was feeling gloomy I was at the same time grateful for much and in general quite a happy and jolly person.
These thoughts – the negative reflections, and the positive actualities began to resolve into some sort of commitment to continue to be active in ways that I can, and to throw off the disillusion that crept in and seemed to come to a critical point with the hopelessly catastrophic results in the recent election here (catastrophic in my opinion of course)
This resolve was accentuated by me re-reading and re-posting something I had written about Steve McQueen’s motto, ‘you’ve got to make it happen’ and by the courage and wit of one very young woman. If little Greta Thunberg can stand up to the bullies with such spark and nerve, and continue her fight – a little, now seventeen year old young woman, taking on those with the most power and influence, then surely I can buck up my ideas!
I resolved! And strangely, since then, as if a switch was thrown, my writing has returned! I’m not quite up to full speed but I’m building up those writing muscles again!