Being absent minded, as I’ve mentioned before, is no joke…. ok so I do make a joke out of it, I do spin a funny story when I lose something, misplace something, end up in the wrong place, read the wrong book/write the wrong story for my various groups, but in fact it’s more than annoying, it’s dispiriting, time wasting, and makes me feel an idiot! I’ve always been like it, since I was a child so it’s not just getting older, although with being older and being forgetful makes others (and sometimes me too) put a different spin on it.
In an effort to make things easier, I no longer take out a bag but try and have a minimal amount of things I need in my pockets, so i’m always patting myself to check my pockets for bank card, phone, handkerchief, face mask, car parking token. I try and laugh it off, but it does trigger some small anxiety. The panic of losing or misplacing or forgetting the thing, the actual loss of the thing – especially if it is vital – bank card, useful/vital – phone, necessary – mask, needed – hankies, loved – countless scarves, jumpers, jackets and other items of favorite clothing, the feeling of being an idiot and stupid, are not some trivial thing.
When people talk about being careless – I’m not careless, I do care, abut somehow my mind wanders off t=somewhere else at the most unexpected and unhelpful moment. When we have been away somewhere, I am almost manic about rushing round checking every room, in every drawer, under every item of furniture, on every shelf/windowsill/mantelpiece, and i very rarely if ever leave anything behind in those situations. it’s the more casual times, leaving home to go for a walk, nipping to the shops, dropping in to the pub.
So most recently it was losing the new bank card I only received the day before. I hadn’t even used it but had taken it somewhere to pick up something I’d ordered and needed it in case they wanted to check my details. I took it with me, didn’t use it, then today when I wanted it I couldn’t find it. I won’t describe the hunt, you can imagine it, but just as i was getting into the car to go into town to go the bank – all the lines were busy because there are less staff working, my darling daughter found it, under my work chair.
Ho-hum, I’ll keep trying to hang on to my possessions and be in the right place at the right time, and write the right thing for the right group, but no doubt I’ll be sharing some other absent minded experience with you before long!