I have come to the conclusion, rather late to be honest, that I must take myself to task and be neater, tidier, more organised. It is – it really is, getting to be ridiculous the amount of times I mislay something, how often I can’t find a vital thingummyjig, how much time I waste looking for that really, really important something, and how frustrating it is. Frustrating because it’s my own fault – and I’ve said before that I’ve always been like this and when I was a child my younger sister always had to look after the money, the tickets, the passport, because I’d be sure to mislay them. Late in the day maybe, but I must try harder to be less casual and more focussed.
I’ve blamed the fact that I’ve always got stories running in my head so I’m sometimes more involved with what my imagination is doing than on what I should actually be doing. I know as people get older they have more tendency for this to happen, and I’m obviously getting older, but I think my main problem/reason now, is that I am disorganised and have too much stuff. I find it difficult to let go of that story I wrote when I was a child, the notebook with odd lines of poetry that has never been finished, cards from people who were close to me who have died, things with my parents’ handwriting on. Mostly I’ve forgotten I have them, and when I find them I think “aww, that’s lovely, oh, I do remember when…” and then I put them back in the box/envelope/folder/file and forget about them until the next time I’m tidying up when it’s a repeat.
So today, at 13:26 I bought some wonderful soap – I do like nice soap and every so often I treat myself to a more expensive bar than usual. I’ve written about soap before:
https://loiselsden.com/2017/05/10/soapy/
At 13;26 I ordered some soap. About two hours later, having sat here at my computer, apart from going to make a coffee, I put my shoes on to go to the shop to get a few things and checked in my wallet… card not there. Now obviously the card is not only still in the house, but probably still here in my writing room… lurking. I have looked through everything, in books, under books, under laptop, on the floor, in papers, in files… It’s somewhere, it’s somewhere close to me as I’m writing this now… but where???
Being absent minded is very annoying.
Lois Elsden 